Not Everyone will Believe You (But Someone Will)
Not everyone will believe you, regardless of how much you wish they would, but someone, somewhere, will believe you, and maybe to start, that person will be you. You may need to search to find someone outside of yourself who believes you, but someone out there will.
Maybe you have found yourself screaming in frustration, “BELIEVE ME! PLEASE!”
Or
“Why would I lie?”
Or
“It hurts!”
Or
“It was magical. Why don’t you believe me?”
A person’s disbelief or inability or unwillingness to sit with you and listen deeply while you share can apply to the good and the bad, the joyous and the painful.
People might look at you begging on your knees for their belief and support, and assume you have lost your mind as you share a personal or life changing experience.
Sometimes, the lower you get to the ground and the louder you scream, the less someone will believe you. That isn’t always true, but it can be.
It doesn’t matter if you’ve healed, found God, experienced trauma, or a beautiful synchronicity that changed the trajectory of your life. There will be folks who don’t understand, don’t grasp, don’t care about what you’re sharing. I know that isn’t always easy to accept, but it’s the way of the world.
Some can’t believe you because they won’t permit themselves to believe or open their heart to the truths of the world. Some don’t have the capacity (right now) to sit with you in your pain or joy. Flat out, some don’t want to feel what you’re feeling, and they have that right, don’t they? There are some folks who don’t have the time or won’t make the time, while some consciously decide not to step into your reality. There are people who haven’t allowed themselves to accept their own story, so how could they accept yours? Some do believe, but don’t have the words. Some need (lots of) time to process, and sometimes lots of time is years. Sometimes it’s an hour.
As challenging as it can be, we don’t have to point fingers or yank someone into our expectations. Aren’t we all on our own journeys? Doesn’t everyone have the right to move at their own pace? Doesn’t this include you? Does everyone have to meet us where we are, even if we are aching for their help or support?
And can we acknowledge, with patience for ourselves, that all of us have failed, at times, to meet folks where they are, too? Whether we are aware of it or not. We are human. It happens, and believe it or not, it’s not always with malice that we fail someone-though it can be. But even so, we are simply doing our best.
So in the name of believing, can you remember that you were there to witness yourself and your experience? You felt it all, and you saw it, heard it, and tasted it, too. Don’t you remember? You know the truth, so doesn’t that mean you believe in yourself? And aren’t you someone? If that’s all you have right now, that’s a lot, so why not go with it?
Stand in your truth with undeniable confidence, as much as you can muster. Honor your story enough to believe in yourself and all that has occurred along the way. Check in with yourself and all that has happened. Decide where you need to go to move on, move up, find support, be heard, and sit in the magic of it all. Why do you need permission from the disbeliever to do what is best for you?
I know it can hurt and be frustrating, embarrassing, and even traumatizing to share a moment of wonder, divinity, sheer pain, or violence, and the person across from you thinks you’re exaggerating, confused, or losing your mind. I know that feeling of wanting to be seen, heard, and believed so you can celebrate, heal, be held, or wonder together in community.
But this moment of disconnection from the person sitting in front of you can be a sign to dig deep and develop richer self-trust. This moment may indicate that it’s time to build up your self-confidence and know where you stand even if no one else stands by you (right now). This moment may be an opportunity to find someone who does believe you (in addition to you). This disconnection or hurt doesn’t have to be a sign to leave anyone behind but to build a strong foundation of communication and support with self and community to show everyone what is possible, including yourself.
